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Jaslene Wins "Top Model," Televisionary Loses Interest Once Renee is Booted

No, I don't want to talk about it. Sure, I was happy that it was Jaslene who was crowned the winner of the eighth "cycle" of America's Next Top Model , rather than Natasha, whom I cannot for the life of me imagine or picture as a model, with her pigeon-walk and... odd facial expressions. Sure, she's spunky and has a great "backstory" but that does not a model make. Basically, I am shocked and stunned that Renee didn't even make it to the final two. That Tyra--with a straight face--actually said that the decision came down to the girl with the bubbly personality and the girl who always takes amazing pictures completely blew me away. In one fell swoop, she basically undermined any credibility this series had. It's almost as if they were grasping at straws for reasons to eliminate Renee (I see no examples of the "puffiness and wrinkling" that Tyra mentioned) in order to ensure that Jaslene would win this competition. Color me pissed. O

Here We Go Again: Charlie Counts Down His Greatest Hits on "Lost"

Where's my Locke? Lost 's producers pulled a bit of a bait and switch on us last night by barely even mentioning the imperiled Locke (shot last week by a vengeful Ben and left to die in the mass grave containing the bodies of his former Dharma comperes), much less revealing whether he's dead or alive. Sure, there was that look of concern from Alex after Locke failed to return to camp with Ben and she knew exactly what her father meant when he said Locke had an accident on the way back. But I was more concerned with whether Charlie would live or die to realize that Locke's fate wouldn't be revealed until next week. Damn you, Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz. Last night's episode of Lost ("Greatest Hits") was the perfect ramp up to next week's two-hour season finale, after which I will be suffering extreme and debilitating withdrawal from the series, which isn't slated to return to ABC until February 2008. (Yes, that does seem like a rather lo

Network Scorecard: CBS

NBC and ABC have already announced their primetime lineups for next season to the advertisers, but the week is still young as CBS gets its shot today at wowing Madison Avenue with its new programs. "We approached our development this year with a specific goal in mind--to be daring and different," said CBS Entertainment President Nina Tassler. "The Fall and mid-season series we have selected offer creativity and variety with great potential to excite and surprise television audiences everywhere." Rather than wait those few hours until CBS's official upfront presentation, here's a look at their official schedule now. CBS Primetime Schedule for the 2007-08 Season: MONDAY 8-8:30 pm: How I Met Your Mother 8:30-9 pm: The Big Bang Theory 9-9:30 pm: Two and a Half Men 9:30-10 pm: Rules of Engagement 10-11 pm: CSI: Miami TUESDAY 8-9 pm: NCIS 9-10 pm: The Unit 10-11 pm: Cane WEDNESDAY 8-9 pm: Kid Nation 9-10 pm: Criminal Minds 10-11 pm: CSI: NY T

"Love Makes Me Lazy": Adventures in Pizneyland on "Veronica Mars"

Sigh. It seems like forever ago that I was excited to watch last night's episode of Veronica Mars , but after learning that my beloved Mars wouldn't be returning next season (thanks again, CW!), I couldn't help but watch the episode feeling more than a little blue. If next week is to be the end of the smart, stylish series, I do wish that Rob Thomas and Co. had been given the opportunity to go out on their own terms and to potentially wrap up the series in the way that makes sense, both for the story and its characters and the viewers of the series. But in the end, in a twist most at home in its noir setting, Veronica Mars was betrayed by a supposed ally: the CW network. Since the move to the CW at the beginning of the season, the WBTV series has been battered around more than that damn Maltese Falcon. It launched on Tuesday nights for one story arc, then it was pulled for several months, only to return for a handful of episodes (in which V. solved the murder of Dean O&#

First They Killed Lily Kane, Now They've Killed "Veronica Mars"

The CW has just become public enemy number one in the Televisionary household. Yes, gentle readers, the netlet has done the unthinkable and cancelled my beloved Veronica Mars . After two days of holding my breath while the networks unveiled their fall schedules, I kept hoping that somehow, some way, the CW would realize it didn't want to get rid of the only series with any critical traction left on their network and find a way (reduced episode count? flash forward in time?) to keep Veronica Mars on the air. Alas, it's official. Next week's episode of Veronica Mars will be the series' last. And I for one am not ready to say goodbye to Neptune just yet. UPDATE: TV Guide 's Michael Ausiello claims the CW may wait until June 15th to decide the final fate of Veronica Mars : "Contractually, the net has until June 15 to reach a verdict, and the extra time would allow Rob Thomas to produce an actual script for Veronica in the FBI. hat's one scenario. The o

Network Scorecard: ABC

With the Peacock already announcing its fall schedule this week, next up is ABC, which readies to make its lineup announcements in a few hours' time. With renewals already issued for many of its series and eleven series orders (including late-in-the-game Miss/Guided ) already out there, don't expect too many surprises from ABC. "We're heading into the new season with a strong lineup of returning shows that we've developed and nurtured over the past few years," said ABC Entertainment President Stephen McPherson in a statement. "That solid foundation will help us launch an exciting development slate as we continue our forward momentum this fall. We're dedicated to working hard week after week to deliver the best stories and most memorable characters on TV." But rather than wait those few hours until ABC's official upfront presentation, here's a look at their official schedule. ABC Primetime Schedule for the 2007-08 Season: MONDAY 8-9

Dancing with the Upfronts: Dramas, Comedies in at Eye

With just a day to go before CBS officially unveils its 2007-08 schedule to advertisers, the Tiffany network nonetheless announced some early pickups for a few dramas and comedies. The selected few are a rather bizarre mix of period drama, supernatural mystery, musical, and a rolled over comedy from last year. (I said they were a diverse bunch.) First up is Laughlin , a US adaptation of popular Brit skein Blackpool (which aired on this side of the pond as Viva Blackpool on BBC America), which fuses musical and mystery genres into one, overblown package. Series, which comes from Sony, BBC, and CBS Paramount, stars Lloyd Owen ( Monarch of the Glen ) as an owner of a small-time casino who dreams of transforming little Laughlin, Nevada into another Vegas but his plans are disrupted when an associate turns up dead. Hugh Jackman produces and guest stars in the pilot. Then there's Moonlight (formerly known as Twilight ), from Warner Bros. Television, which follows a private detective