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"Veronica Mars": Nobody Likes a Blonde in a Hampster Ball

Okay, so no one ended up dead as a result of Lucky's rampage through the outdoor dining area of Neptune High on last night's episode of Veronica Mars ("Happy Go Lucky"). Well, no one besides Lucky himself, who was taken out in a hail of bullets (okay, one bullet), despite the fact that his gun was loaded with blanks. A rather "lucky" fact for Wallace, who tried to save a cowering Jackie from becoming Victim Number One, only to get "shot" twice in the chest.

Poor Lucky. Poor dead Lucky. When he's not allegedly leaving "presents" for evil Mayor Woody Goodman (i.e. homemade bombs) or stalking Woody's daughter Gia, he's wearing a baseball catcher's mask and washing his feet with bleach. Turns out that he did know something about the Mayor--something huge--that made him scared to talk: he was molested by the Mayor several years earlier when he was one of the local baseball team's batboys. And it turns out that he wasn't the only one that the Mayor was, er, tampering with: two of his other victims just happened to die in the bus crash. Such a coincidence, no?

One of those victims had boasted about outing someone really big in Neptune, "the outing of all outings," so he was going to spill the beans about Woody's secret proclivities. Woody finds out and arranges for a bomb to be put on the school bus--along with a rat to ensure that his daughter Gia and her little rich friends aren't on the bus at the time it goes boom--and maybe makes a deal with the Fitzpatricks to detonate the explosive at the right time. That settles most of that, except for the fact that the Mayor has now fled to parts unknown... and we still don't know why Curly Moran, former stunt supervisor for Aaron Echolls on "The Long Haul," had Veronica's name written on his hand when he washed up on the beach, dead. But more on that next week.

Turns out that Jackie isn't killed by Lucky... or pregnant (yet anyway). But she has fled for France a little early, not even pausing to say goodbye to boyfriend Wallace. And just when I was starting to like her too. Her dad Terrence finally gets off the hook for the bus crash (casino owner Lobo comes forward and says that Terrence was with him during the crash), then turns around and forces Jackie out of Neptune, just when she had decided to give up the Sorbonne to stay in town. Sure, it's for her own good as much as his: in return for the alibi, Lobo is coercing Terrence into working for him day and night. So is this the last we'll see of the feisty (yet somewhat humbled) Jackie? Something tells me she'll be back...

But there was one glorious piece of news in last night's episode that made me dance with sheer glee: Mac (Tina Majorino) will be staying in Neptune next year, as Wallace makes a particular point to tell Veronica (and all of us watching). So while Veronica has her heart set on Stanford, something tells me that she'll end up attending school a little closer to home. And maybe, just maybe, Rob Thomas was listening to me and decided to make Mac a full castmember next season by making her Veronica's soon-to-be college roomie. Fingers crossed.

(Also something to ponder: is Cassidy's secret tied into he Mayor's tendencies for teenage boys? From the looks of Mac crying next week, something big happens to everyone's favorite computer hacker... and the fact that Cassidy and Mac have reunited somewhat leads me to believe that it has something to do with the youngest Casablancas man.)

Is it just me or have you too lost all faith in Neptune's jury system after this week's episode? Nefarious action film star and Lily Kane-killer Aaron Echolls was cleared not only of the murder charges, but also of the charges of kidnapping and statutory rape, no less. Poor Logan turned states evidence and testified against in father in return for immunity against the felony charges of destruction of evidence (he erased those oh-so-crucial tapes of Aaron having sex with Lily Kane), only to have his father walk free at the end of the episode. And Aaron is not one to sit back and forgive and forget. No, he's sort of the scorched-earth revenge type and I am sure he plans to get even with Veronica. And if he can form a wedge between Veronica and daddy Keith--having her STD and arrest for breaking into the Mannings' home come out during the trial was pure evil--so much the better.

And look, who's that in next week's promos? Why it's Duncan, Veronica's on-the-lam ex-boyfriend who resurfaces, I'm sure, after hearing about Aaron's exoneration. Will Duncan return to Neptune to extract some justice of his own? How does Meg and, more importantly, Meg's creepy father and her poor abused sister tie into all of this? Will Aaron again lock Veronica in a refrigerator and set fire to a house just to get even with her?

Answers to these questions and more next week in the season finale of Veronica Mars ("Not Pictured"), when Veronica solves the mystery of the bus crash and she and the Neptune High seniors celebrate their graduation. Given what's already happened this season, let's just hope that the survival rate of Veronica's graduating class is higher than, say, Buffy Summers'.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: The Amazing Race (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); One Tree Hill (WB); Alias (ABC); Bones (FOX); America's Next Top Model (UPN)

9 pm: Criminal Minds (CBS); Dateline (NBC); The Bedford Diaries (WB); Lost (ABC); American Idol/Unan1mous (FOX); Everybody Hates Chris/Everybody Hates Chris (UPN)

10 pm: CSI: New York (CBS); Law & Order (NBC); Invasion (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

6 pm: What Not to Wear.

This week on the original British transformation show, makeover mavens Trinny and Susannah take on two middle-aged men (yes, men) who are going through a mid-life crisis. Will they come out the other end with a new lease on life and looks? Or will Trinny and Susannah send them crying with their patented brand of torture?

8 pm: The Amazing Race.

With the teams dwindling--sorry, Fran and Barry--this week on The Amazing Race ("Man, They Should Have Used Fake Names"), the remaining competitors travel to Australia, where they must swim with crocodiles and dive out of airplanes. So, just another typical day in the life of an Amazing Race player.

9 pm: Lost.

I have been waiting for this episode for two weeks now and it's finally here. On a new episode of Lost ("Two for the Road"), Jack and Kate are reeling from the reappearance of Michael--last seen heading off into the jungle to find his missing son Walt--but manage to get some information about the whereabouts of the Others. Meanwhile, Ana Lucia interrogates the prisoner but the Other-Formerly-Known-As-Henry-Gale has plans of his own.

10 pm: Top Chef.

Yay, an entirely Stephen-free episode! On tonight's installment of Top Chef ("Napa's Finest"), the remaining chefs--Lee Anne, Tiffani, Harold, and Dave--must prepare dishes cook for some big time Napa Valley chefs. Watch with amazement as Dave breaks under the pressure and bursts into tears!


Anonymous said…
First off - love the post title. That was definitely the line of the night, and one I rewound so I could giggle again.

Last night's ep was definitely a gripping one, and I have no idea how they wrap up all loose ends next week, especially w/Aaron out of jail and Duncan in the picture. I can't wait!

I will say that for me, the whole trial thing goes way beyond losing faith in Neptune's justice system. I pretty much thought all the court stuff was lame and rushed. And poorly written, not a trait of this show, usually. And what is with VM having all these obnoxious cliches lately - the verdict comes in just as Veronica is about to take her last final? Puhlease.
Anonymous said…
"Nobody Likes a Blonde in a Hampster Ball" is now one of my favorite Veronica lines of all times.

Last night's episode was fantasic. I'm glad that no one in VM's gang got shot but I am furious that Aaron, Logan's creepy dad, in now on the loose. And with Woody MIA that makes two creepy dads on the loose...not to mention Dick and Beaver's father who is still on the lam as well as Duncan's daddy who skipped town (with Duncan's mom) at the end of last season. Keith Mars should definitely win Neptune's "Father of the Year" award!

Next week's episode (the final one of the season...sniff) looks intense. I can't wait!
ticknart said…
Wouldn't it be horrible if Cassidy was the person behind the bus crash. He was probably molested by Woody. It's not too much of a stretch to guess that he was the third person on the recording in Woody's e-mail, the voice that was erased. He was in the limo following the bus. He's smart enough to find out how to build a bomb, or get someone else to do it for him. (His brother did hang out with Lucky.)

The question, then, goes to his motive.

The other voice was erased off the message probably because that person was trying to convince the others not to out Woody. Why? Because that third person doesn't want to be dragged around by the cops and asked about being molested by Woody, which would happen to anyone who could be found from all the teams Woody coached over the years, as well as all the bat boys for the Sharks.

Cassidy seems to be pretty sensitive about anything that has to do with sex. I don't think he'd want to be forced to talk about it. I'm sure that he doesn't want his brother or father to find out, either; they already think he's girly enough.

If that seems like enough of a motive, then is Cassidy capable of killing?

I'm not sure. He pulled a pretty nasty trick on Dick when he hired the transvestite, but that certainly isn't the same as killing.

I'm not saying that Cassidy Casablancas is the killer (I don't want him to be. I like him.), but, to me, he's a strong possibility, even if it seems that the evidence is pointing to Woody Goodman.
Jace Lacob said…
ticknart, that is one *VERY* interesting theory.

While I don't actually think that Cassidy has it in him to murder a busload of kids (what would he really gain by killing his fellow molestation victims? why not Lucky?), I do think that it was Cassidy's voice that was removed from the recording that Veronica found on Woody's computer. I definitely think Veronica will discover this and/or Mac as well.

While all the clues point to Woody, I still think there might be more to this than meets the eye. Perhaps there were two separate crimes planned--the bus crash AND Veronica's murder--that just happened to nearly coincide...
Anonymous said…
Last night was a traumatic one. I watched LOST, ALIAS and VERONICA MARS (tivo'd) all in a row. Death, doppelgangers, and daddy deviants! It's a wonder that I made it to work this morning.

My hope for VERONICA MARS: Cassidy is revealed to be the bus bomber. I am guessing that Cassidy knew about Kendall's true identity when she married his dad, blackmailed her to get her to use her influence with the Fitzpatricks, and got them to blow up the bus to keep Woody's other victims from coming forward. That boy wears too much makeup to be so innocent. But I am sure I am off by a mile. I thought Celeste Kane did it last season.

I also hope that Liane Mars will return for Veronica's graduation and hopefully bring with her a mystery to solve next season. That alone would keep Veronica close to Neptune.

Also, I really want Principal Van Clemmons on the show next season. I like that he's one of the few adults who gets Veronica. He has a soft spot for her, respects her and knows what she's capable of. Perhaps he could get involved with Liane (as they did go to high school together and he probably admired her from afar) and be tied into next season's big mystery.

And what about Logan's mom? She could bring the big mystery if she's not really dead.
Anonymous said…
There's a growing number of us spoiler-free fans out here who avoid even the promos for next week's episodes. Any chance you can use spoiler tags in future posts? I'd appreciate it, otherwise your site will have to be avoided like so many others. Thanks.

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